Josie says
What happens when you lose your voice.
Instead of talking you choke up. Like you’re going to cry. All the time.
Just to relieve the pressure of all the things you cannot say.
And you can’t even remember why it is that you cannot say them.
You tell yourself they were stupid anyway.
Probably they would have revealed you as the fool you are.
Unfit for human understanding. Unfit for human conversation. Unfit for human anything.
So. Better to be silent. Better to go and stick your head in an oven. Or in a bowl of water. Breathe in water instead of air. Or in a pillow. Fill yourself with something different. `
Gas
Water
Feathers
Anything to fill this awful empty.
Anything.