Almost Famous Monologues

Almost Famous (Lester Bangs)

You cannot make friends with the rock stars. If you’re gonna be a true journalist. If you’re a rock journalist, first, you will never get paid much. But you will get free records from the record company. Fuckin nothing about you that’s controversial man. It’s gonna get ugly.And they’ll buy you drinks, you’ll meet girls, they’ll try to fly you places for free, offer you drugs… I know. It sounds great. But they are not your friends. These are people who want you to write sanctimonious stories about the genius of the rock stars, and they will ruin rock and roll and strangle everything we love about it. They are trying to buy respectability for a form that is gloriously And righteously dumb. Now, you’re smart enough to know that. And the day it ceases to be dumb is the day that it ceases to be real, right? And then it just becomes an industry of…cool. I’m tellin’ you, you’re coming along at a very dangerous time for rock ‘n’ roll. I mean, the war is over. They won. And 99% of what passes for rock ‘n’ roll these days, silence is more compelling. That’s why I think you should just turn around and go back, you know, and be a lawyer or something. But I can tell from your face that you won’t. I can give you 35 bucks. Give me a thousand words on Black Sabbath.

Almost Famous (Jeff Bebe)

Some people have a hard time explaining rock ‘n’ roll. I don’t think anyone can really explain rock ‘n’ roll. Maybe Pete Townshend, but that’s okay. Rock ‘n’ roll is a lifestyle and a way of thinking… and it’s not about money and popularity. Although, some money would be nice. But it’s a voice that says, “Here I am… and fuck you if you can’t understand me.” And one of these people is gonna save the world. And that means that rock ‘n’ roll can save the world… all of us together. And the chicks are great. But what it all comes down to is that thing. The indefinable thing when people catch something in your music.

Almost Famous (Lester Bangs)

Oh man, you made friends with ’em. See, friendship is the booze they feed you. They want you to get drunk on feeling like you belong….Because they make you feel cool, and hey, I met you. You are not cool….We are uncool. Women will always be a problem for guys like us, most of the great art in the world is about that very problem. Good looking people they got no spine, their art never lasts. They get the girls but we’re smarter… Great art is about guilt and longing. Love disguised as sex and sex disguised as love. Let’s face, you got a big head start…. I’m always home, I’m uncool. …The only true currency is this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you’re uncool. My advice to you, I know you think these guys are your friends, you want to be a true friend to ‘em, be honest and unmerciful.

Almost Famous (Penny Lane)

I always tell the girls, never take it seriously, if ya never take it seriosuly, ya never get hurt, ya never get hurt, ya always have fun, and if you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends.

Almost Famous (Lester Bangs)

Oh man, you made friends with ’em. See, friendship is the booze they feed you. They want you to get drunk on feeling like you belong….Because they make you feel cool, and hey, I met you. You are not cool….We are uncool. Women will always be a problem for guys like us, most of the great art in the world is about that very problem. Good looking people they got no spine, their art never lasts. They get the girls but we’re smarter… Great art is about guilt and longing. Love disguised as sex and sex disguised as love. Let’s face, you got a big head start…. I’m always home, I’m uncool. …The only true currency is this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you’re uncool. My advice to you, I know you think these guys are your friends, you want to be a true friend to ‘em, be honest and unmerciful.